It's so easy to forget

I'm a nurse ar a corona ward. Some days I work at the Intensive Care, completely covered in all sorts of protective gear. It takes quite sometime to dress up. We stay as long as possible in that gear, sweating, and hurting, even creating wounds. When undressing we have to take all sorts of procautions and because of that it takes longer than usual.

When I walk out of the hospital it's like walking in another world, on another planet.
Concentrating all day, caring for people, hiding your own emotions, because you can't wipe your tears away.....

So last week I had a huge shock of realising how being free from this all makes you fall in another concentration, the one of wanting things to be normal.
Not even wanting....Just living very tired and exhausted something normal.

So I came home and was very hungry.
Walked to the kitchen and took a slice of bread with butter.
Just like that!

I forgot to wash my hands, take change my clothes, take a shower.
I was just very hungry and extremely tired and took a slice of bread,
not even on a plate, switched the TV on and ate....

When I realised it was too late!

I feel so stupid!

But it makes clear how fatique makes you drop down in daily habits.
You don't think, you just follow the first thoughts that come in your mind, and act upon them.

Now I'm very cautious, even more than before.

.