Choices

Yesterday the prime minister was very clear: stay in!!
I think most people got it.

Except Mr.Intelligent who wants to go for dinner to son 2 tomorrow.
Son 2 is the journalist. He's doing his job all around town, so chances the virus finds him are large.
He has some health problems at the moment, so who knows what is going on?

But telling Mr.Intelligent not to go is in his mind even more motivation to go.
So I keep my mouth shut.
Son 2 stays away to protect me.
Mr.Intelligent..he lost the feeling to care for someone else a long time ago. But as he is the man who keeps on throwing around facts...whether they are the right ones or not... he has to make his own decisions. And live with them...
Some people think they know best... well, I have decided to grant them their wish.

It's a kind of social distancing the government doesn't intent, but when I can't get that physical distance I need, let's make it into a mind thing.

Maybe it's because I worry such a lot about my friends of the Army Air Corps. Some are still strong, but others can use some care.
Maybe it's because of that feeling that I don't belong here, but should be where I was happy.

We planned to go to England one of these months and we can't.
Like everyone else in this blue world we're confined to our houses.

The past weeks I saw something interesting happening.
An online guy posing himself as someone he is not. Commenting on my contributions with a downward attitide I know so well from some women-disliking men. They think the world of themselves... and never fail to try to step on everything the others says or does.

I used to feel small near such a person, but now I'm older I've lost that. Also thanks to my army friends.

Well, today I got enough of him. Did the polite things and then took the step back into my own world.

I don't want to pay attention to those negative people.

It's a choice how you deal with this crisis.
I don't want other people have the influence on my feelings they usually have.
So time to change my reactions and follow my intuition.

If I die I want to go the process I went 5,5 years ago.
The buddhist way.

If I stay alive, I want to be me.
Not a mosaic of all those other people's influences,
but me....

just me.